Chapter 1- Hobo.
Hello! Welcome to the brand new Schmoe legacy.
Our founder’s name is Joe Schmoe because I’m
uncreative. So lets meet our suave, debonair founder, shall we?
Joe- You smell that?
No I don’t and I’m glad.
Joe traits are insane, loser, inappropriate, mooch and slob. Ladies please refrain from throwing yourself at him.
His lifetime wish is to be a gold digger (see the ghost of wealthy spouse) its funny cause its unlikely.
Joe: Yeah right, I’m hot.
You’re a diamond in the rough, I’m sure.
This is Joe’s “house”
Don’t ask how he got the Wolff’s lot.
Joe- I ate them.
He has an outhouse *with a DOOR* and a sleeping bag.
The first thing he did was see if the Wolff’s left anything in their trash.
He found a big space rock and a rare seed, good find.
I sent him to the park to meet some ladies.
Here he is putting the moves on Tamara.
Joe- Watch my eyes, you..are..getting..very..horny.
I don’t think she’s buying it.
Tamara- DO NOT WANT.
Joe- Hey hey little lady, calm down, lets make a deal, how much for a-
Tamara- GO AWAY GUY I’M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT.
Joe- One last goodbye kiss?
After that failure, he met Cornelia, who is apparently a stylist in this savefile.
She even let him get close enough to her to tell her a secret.
Joe- My dad likes to fart!
Joe- Can I have a LARGE SUM OF MONEY?
Cornelia- Sure! Here is one simoleon.
Joe- Here let me express my gratitude . *puckers*
Cornelia- EW EW EW EW.
Sadly it ended there.
Joe- She couldn’t handle it.
Sorry, couldn’t resist.
Joe and Emma really did have a moment there, they stared at each other the whole time they ate.
Mortimer- *Sneaks in picture like a ninja*
Then they bonded over their plan to rummage the unattended bake stand.
Joe was too tired to finish the conversation however, and decided to sleep right where he was at.
By the looks of it Emma had some needs to attend to herself.
Emma- OH GOD ITS PRAIRIE DOGGING!
He woke up 3 hours later to find her still standing there.
Emma- Huh? No I wasn’t watching him sleep I uh-
(I also just noticed I forgot to pick his outfits except everyday. Oops. I’ll fix that later.)
Emma- Uh oh.
Joe- CONTROL YOURSELF, WOMAN!
And we end this post with this very random pic of Joe skinny dipping in the public pool.
I thought I had more pictures than that, but I guess not. I hope that you liked my first post and I should have another one up sometime this week. 🙂